just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
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