As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
