On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
