Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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