I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
