Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
