i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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