I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
