the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
