You really coming over, don't trick.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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