At least make sure they are 18
Why
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
