Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
