ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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