You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize