I'd wear matching sweaters with you
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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