At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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