i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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