im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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