Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
