i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We left an ass print on the piano.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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