Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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