how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
