I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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