why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize