I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
it's like iHOP with fire
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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