What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
