I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
