wat bout pragnant strippers??
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
