They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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