Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
birth control should be required to get into college
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
