no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
