a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
