I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize