is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
i believe in u and ur pee
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
