Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
