I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
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