I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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