Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
