The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize