question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......