So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I hope mine doesn't look like that
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
well you can't waste a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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