Operation Purity has been aborted
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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