My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
