dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
