Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i love accidental penises.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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