Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
