Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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