dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
