please come you make the beer taste better
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
