Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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