I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize